THE PARENTING CHRONICLES: REAL STORIES FROM REAL MUMS (AND DADS)

We are launching a new exciting blog featuring stories from our amazing, wonderful, loyal and dedicated customers. 

We start our new fun blog speaking to Joan about her motherhood journey with her 13-month old toddler, Caius. 

Introduction: Can you share a little bit about you and your family (how many children, ages, location)

Hello! I’m Joan, 29 this year. My hubby, NY, is 10 years older than me. We have a boy, Caius, 13 months now! We’re living in Singapore.

Opening Up: Can you share a turning point in your motherhood journey?  Was it a moment of joy, a challenge that made you stronger, or something else that shaped who you are as a mother today? 

I used to be an early childhood educator and I always loved children, so I was looking forward to being a mother. But no one can ever be ready enough to be a parent - every child is uniquely different, and they change so quickly. I remembered there was a night when I was frustrated because our boy, 2 months old, was over-stimulated and couldn’t settle down that night.

I was latching him for a long time trying to calm him down and put him down to bed. At my wits end, I handed him to my Husband and said I need a break. After we finally managed to put him down, NY and I had a talk about the situation, and NY reminded me that the days are long but the years are short. We should embrace the moments of being needed as Caius is not going to need us when he’s older. That gave me a shift in mindset.

Afterwards, I enjoyed every moment with Caius and I was hardly frustrated when he misses a nap or has a cranky day. I feel I’m in bliss and enjoying every moment with him.

Finding Your Balance:  Motherhood has so many facets.  How do you find harmony between your roles as a mum, your personal identity, and your career or passions? 

In preparation for motherhood, I took a leap of faith to set up my own business, ToddLearn.Play and teach some private tuition so that I can be a full-time mother and work part time. It’s definitely difficult to balance and I’m definitely a mother more than a teacher, a business owner, a daughter, or just myself. I know very clearly that Caius is my priority now. We make sacrifices in our lifestyle while career is not my priority at this phase of my life. Most importantly, I’m at peace with this arrangement and NY is 100% supportive.

Support Systems:  We all need a listening ear or helping hand sometimes!  Who are the people in your "village" who uplift you on your motherhood journey? 

Motherhood can be a very lonely journey. I’m thankful for my church friends and cell group mates who are there to listen and pray for us as a family. On top of this, I’m very glad to meet a group of positive and uplifting mummies from my EDD chat. These mummies who’re going through the same phases with their babies share tips and even words of encouragement to support each other. That makes the journey less lonely. The strongest pillar of strength is definitely NY, my supportive husband, and my parents who are always ready to help out with Caius whenever we need.

Advice for New Moms:  If you could go back in time, what's one piece of wisdom you'd give yourself as a brand-new mum?

Be present in the moment instead of trying too hard to follow schedules or make things work. Go with the flow, embrace the moments and treasure them.

 

Celebrating Motherhood:  In the whirlwind of daily life, how do you carve out moments to celebrate the gift of motherhood, big and small?

It can be as simple as looking at Caius' smile, or just sitting with NY and staring at Caius while he sleeps. Every second, as our boy is growing, is worth celebrating. I enjoy keeping a diary of photos to keep track of the many first experiences Caius shares with me and looking at them is rewarding to me as well.